Every night I came home stressed, frustrated, upset and just sad. Most of the time I felt very disheartened by how mean people are to each other.
Recent weeks have made me wonder when we became culture of criticizing at all turns, of judging, of always looking for something negative. But at the same time, offering no solutions, nothing constructive and affecting no positive change.
As a kid, my dad would expect me to come with a plan if I wanted something. And that I have multiple backup plans. He taught me not to complain about things without offering solutions on how to make it better. I've had bosses say, don't come to me with problems, come to me with solutions.
Of course, I don't have solutions to world hunger, to curing cancer, to war or Palestine, but I have great respect for the people who are trying.
Maybe being an adult means constantly questioning the world and constantly feeling unsettled because life just keeps hurling lemons at you, or maybe this us just a period of growth, but even on the worst of days, I'm going to keep looking for solutions.
-------
In other news, we finally got the garage cleaned out and can park both cars in there, just in time for the first snow of the season.
If you ever want to see me so scared that my stomach starts to hurt, watch me drive on ice/snow up and down the huge hills between the Homestead and town. Of my gosh, it's awful.
From what I hear, it's normally not super icy on the roads, but for the first snow, it had been very warm, then rained/sleeted, then snowed and froze. My drive to work Monday reminded me of the time I was riding a rollercoaster in the 9th grade against my will. I hate rollercoasterd and the boys in our group pretty much picked me up and put me in. I was so terrified that I had pulled the harness so tight that my knuckles were white and I couldn't get out when the ride ended. It took several people, including ride workers, to get me out and I remember being very close to having an all out meltdown for fear that I'd have to ride it again.
But, the snowy view from the Homestead is beautiful. I survived the drive and hey, at least the garage is finally functional.
We put the office together, sort of, in the Lace Room, laid wire for the dog fence and got some organizing done.
In the shop, boyfriend found an old saw, skis and all kinds of weird stuff between the walls that he's taking down. Some of the wood appears to be reclaimed barn wood and we're hoping to be able to reuse it somehow.
Happy weekend from the frozen tundra! Here's what it looked like Monday.